So it's into the fucking breach tomorrow. I leave for New Mexico in the morning with bow and arrow in hand in search of the mighty wapiti. Elk hunting, son! Solo! In a mountain range I've never been to before!
I am stupid, small, and scared.
But hey, the tickets and tags and new gear are all purchased and packed so I might as well suck it up and go. What's the worst that could happen? Eaten by a bear? I was probably asking for it. Fall to my death? Serves me right for not paying attention. Fucked up and forgot to bring enough water? Death by dehydration is for the stupid so sign me up. Struck by lightning? Told you there wasn't a God, just impersonal and random Mother Nature.
If it all really works I come back with meat and antlers and a great story. If it almost works I come back with meat and a great story about shooting a cow elk. If it doesn't work I come back empty handed with some sweet photos of my very expensive camping trip in the woods. If it really doesn't work I don't come back. Three out of four odds? I've had worse and been massively less prepared so...
But let's look on bright side: I'm actively adding to my mystique in Hollywood. I'm staying fit and young at heart. I'm contributing the local environment in New Mexico. I'm contributing to the proper management of wildlife and funding for said wildlife programs. And hey, Captain Killjoy Preggers said I could go! Maybe we should change her name. Maybe.
OK, I'm off to give my gear the once over for the forty-seventh time.
Peace out, bitches!
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